This dating pool is shallow – in fact I think I hit a rock on the bottom of this ocean. Not rock bottom mind you. I’ll eventually find something but Saturday’s crash will leave a bit of a mark. After Thursday’s disappointing match results I had narrowed my selections to just six. Two that I really thought showed promise, two that I felt I had to visit because the numbers looked good – even if their location (not the safest street in the hood, and not on the prettiest block) don’t have me aflutter at the thought of our first encounter, and two that are on streets that are considered “well-heeled”. These final two I will visit mostly out of curiosity, and with the knowledge that they are out of my league. Their prices per square foot are outrageous. At over $1100. a foot and address aside – a lot of room for improvement, I would be getting myself metaphorically over my head in unchartered waters. I like a challenge but I don’t think even I could find a way to squeeze another $200. a foot out of these bachelors in under a year.
Of the two I was scheduled to see yesterday – my two with promise, they looked good on paper, checking a lot of the boxes: AC, Private outdoor space, in unit washer and dryer, high owner occupancy in the building, one even had a parking spot. I suspect you are anticipating the let down, as you should astute reader. When I arrived on time for my date with destiny, I was rudely confronted with a note taped to the door, gently flapping in the breeze, with the harsh pronouncement that MY potential property had decided to go steady with another – before he even met me. Oh the indignity of it all! Timing is everything or so they say.
A short walk took me to the address of my next potential crush, but it was evident immediately that we were not meant to be. A garden level unit with limited natural light, and a rather odd smell emanating from its depths had me doing an about-face. I’m a bit like a plant, I thrive in natural light and wilt in the shadows, and that smell hints of something quite unhealthy under the surface. I don’t mind old but you’ve got to be in good condition.
Today I will visit the others, but don’t think I will be rousing Alan from his birthday celebration on the Cape to draft an offer or texting Lissa to produce the necessary, and seemingly fruitless pre-qualification documentation. The only pre-qualification that seems to turn a head is CASH, it’s Boston’s version of the blond, blue eyed California girl, they can’t seem to see me standing right in front of them with the goods. One must make an effort none-the-less. I don’t need dozens of suitors, I only need one to appreciate what I have to offer. The search continues…..