Clearly I am seeking. I have made no secret of it. This Quest of mine has been neatly packaged and bound, flip after flip anchoring the pages of my story to the tacky binding of my unfinished book. Whether you are rooting for me or against me, indifferent, apathetic, or uninclined, you’re seeking too. We’re seekers. That urgency, the burning need to leave a mark, the charcoaled edged of the embered wood lending credence to our existence. Of our 7 core instincts; anger, fear, panic-grief, maternal care, pleasure/lust, play, and here it is: seeking, it is thought that the last of these instincts should in fact be the first. It is considered the most powerful of them all. Isn’t that delightful, delectable, darned amazing? We want answers, we want higher ground, clarity, clairvoyance or something close to it. Something that makes our us-ness special. Chevy Chase used to open his Saturday Night Live performances with: I’m Chevy Chase, and YOU are not…. I think that sums it up nicely. We are looking for validation, in the way only we can. The way that matters to us most, though admittedly, that too can be foggy at times. Doubt creeps in and rears her gorgon, snake filled main of hair, her monstrous wings propelling her through the air, swinging dangerously close to you, and all your uncertainty. Don’t let her mystical beauty lull you into a false sense of security. Medusa is not your friend, stand your ground, fling barbed questions to pierce and silence the snakes. I think it helps in finding the answers for you, and your personal pilgrimage.
Here I am on the threshold of yet another milestone, technically it is time for me to sell my little one bed, tucked away off the busy city street, behind a gated entry, that opens to a tree filled courtyard, and a front door – your own front door. Who gets to live in the South End for under a million dollars, with their own front door? Well, me, and perhaps you too if you are desirous of that sort of thing. A home that lives like a town house, instead of a condo. Your own private entry, your own mail box, your own wood burning fireplace for cozy fall evenings, and central air for hot late summer days. It’s a magical jewel box of a property, but as the Budda says – everything is impermanent. It is time for me to pass the pleasure onto another. The question is, two years or not, should I be selling during a pandemic?
It’s never been my wish to have a hoard of people on the steps of my home, fists in the air like the floor of the stock exchange at the final bell, begging to buy my property. No, I am more interested in that one person, one couple, that falls madly in love with what I have created, and knows instantly that they have found their mate in this home. I guess the answer that I am looking for from you is yes, it’s possible to find someone like that, even in a pandemic. Am I right or am I wrong. Feel free to weigh in, everyone has an opinion.